My Wildest Dreams

WARNING - THIS BLOG POST STARTS OUT WITH A SLIGHTLY GRAPHIC BACK STORY.

When I was 2 (?) years old I had a bad accident where I cut my lower lip into half, I still have the scar as a reminder. The cut was so severe that I can still see the blood-covered towel and taste the iron in my mouth just by reminiscing this accident.

Obviously, I was rushed to the near by hospital immediately, and though I have no recollection of the 5 minute drive to the hospital, I do remember the staring faces of these grownups around me, some doctors, some nurses and some bystanders waiting for their turn to be treated.

I was laid down on the hospital bed, literally strapped in kicking and screaming as my mother was escorted out of the room (she too terrified as she was not even 20 years old herself).

I remember bright lights in my face, a female nurse holding me down and the needle going through my skin as the doctor tried to vigorously patch me up. 7 stitches later I was sent home where I was spoiled with ice cream for days or at least that's what I can remember.

Years later I would have nightmares of being in that hospital, those staring faces, being strapped in and that feeling of being sewn up. They would reoccur till I was fifteen and then all of the sudden they stopped, and I haven't seen this nightmare since.

The scar is there but the pain is gone; both physical and mental.

I don't often remember my dreams yet do you know that feeling when you’re in the midst of an amazing dream and all the sudden you wake up. That slight disappointment you feel where you kinda feel like you missed out on a great ending of a fascinating story. I admit trying to go back to sleep just to "finish" that one last scene, never being lucky enough to truly catch on.

Well how about those dreams and nightmares that seem so real, those reoccurring ones that made you scared and sweat through the sheets.

Years ago I had a dream where I couldn't protect myself and my boys. It was a reoccurring nightmare I had for years. I even remember talking about it with my therapist at the time. Their advise turned out to be the best thing ever, it was to get enough courage to face the attacker which I eventually did and after facing them in my nightmare scene that had repeated itself for years, I immediately stop having those dreams. Dreams are an everyday occurrence in our lives, but they are something most of us feel like we have no control over. For me recognizing that I was in a dream and realizing that I had the power to take the reins, gave be the ability to change that situation. I guess just like Dorothy, I had the power all along.

Same as in life when it feels like we are losing control, we can start off by doing things we do have control over, this will enable us to become resilient and eventually over come those scarier things too.

Do you remember your dreams easily? Any reoccurring ones that you love or hate? What do you think dreams are? I would love to hear more, please leave a comment or send a message on Instagram, this is such a fascinating subject I'd love to explore more.