Have you ever felt like you weren’t completely the center of your own life? As if you were in the passenger’s seat passively observing what's going on - enslaved to the dominant driver and main character?
It’s as if you live your life by obligations others are creating, and you have forgotten what it means to live by your own rhythm and beat - maybe you've even lost the ability to feel enthusiastic about things, and you're just stuck in the flow of everything around you.
You are not alone.
But what does it actually mean - being the main character?
Being the main character is; not comparing yourself, listening to your own wants, needs, and boundaries, not people pleasing and trying to be perfect.
But accept who you are, because you are that leading person of your story.
How to get there?
Focus On Your Passion:
This does not mean ignoring all other responsibilities but it does mean that the things that you are passionate about and bring joy are things you need to focus on. Why else are we here, if not to enjoy it?
Stop Feeling Responsible:
This is a difficult one for some people, even for me. Feeling guilty or responsible for other peoples decisions and actions is not going to benefit you, your life and will only disrupt your wellbeing - it doesn't even help them.
You are not responsible for the happiness or success of others. Lead by example.
Consider Your Supporting Characters:
Who are those you have surrounded yourself with; do they make you better or bitter? Pay attention to your environment, that will affect your energy and emotions.
You Control Your Destiny:
At the end of the day you control your destiny. Not your kids, not your friends, not your boss, or your fears, not your worries or your circumstances - you do.
Recognized that you can choose which doors to open and which to close. Anything you wanted is at your fingertips.
If you just waited for your anxiety and dread to go away you will never accomplish anything or enjoy life.
Be active and commit to the idea that you are enough and that you hold the reigns to your own life.
Stop Complaining:
If you consume a lot of negativity, you will never break free from it and will miss out on all the amazing things that can happen.
Yes, there are many things that have happened in the course of your life that seems unfair, we've all experienced something, some more than others but dwelling on it has never made it better.
Not to be too blunt but snap out of it and start counting your blessings instead.
You Have Nothing to Lose:
Fear is what takes away your ability to feel like the main character and hinders your capability to feel centered.
Pick yourself up and get into that ‘why not?’ attitude. I guarantee that the more things you start doing (despite fear, and awkwardness), the more and more confidence you will gain that you’ve got this. Slowly but surely you will find yourself back in the driver’s seat.
Will there be other stories where you are not the main character?
I hope so.
You can be a supporting character in many: the best friend, the love interest, the boss, the co-worker, the quirky neighbor. Heck, I hope you become a recurring loved character that spreads joy and happiness everywhere you go.
But in your story, you are the main character. Don’t sell yourself, or your story, short by not acting like it.
Far from having too many, the world can never enough great characters to look up to, and get inspired from.
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