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  • Writer's pictureSarah M.

awkward silences and great conversations

Is there awkwardness in the silence or does the silence bring calmness?

I have this friend (let's call her Tilly) who I've known for over a decade and though we aren't particularly close we have had some deep and meaningful conversations throughout our shared years.

I find it fascinating that it doesn't inquire a lot to connect with some people and then for no particular reason we don't connect with others. You know, individuals you have those uncomfortable silences with? And it's not like there is anything necessarily wrong with your relationship with them, it's just that feeling...that awkwardness in the silent moments.

Then there are people we instantly click with, you just know that this person gets me or there's that feeling of familiarity right from the get-go; a soul connection. And this isn't always just a romantic connection, but in friendships too.

Happiness in the stillness

What makes us connect with others more? Even people who we might not have a whole lot in common with, we can still have this profound relationship.

Like those friends from high school or maybe even kindergarten where you never see each other but when you do, it's just like nothing has changed and the connection is just authentic and unconditional. Where does it come from?

I believe real connections are more than just talking or sharing interests, it's about empathy and compassion, we feel kindheartedness to the person we are connecting with.

As to those great relationships, I love that calmness the silence brings, just being there, no need to fill the air with words. Happiness in the stillness. Being available in that moment.

I guess the best combination for me is when there's a perfect balance of conversation and silence. Where we can talk with ease and enjoy the power of peacefulness. Never feeling the need to force it, just being in that little while.

As for me and Tilly, we cool! We connect when we can and when we do, her and I can talk for hours about how we turned out to be relatively sane humans while simultaneously trying to figure out how horseshoes are made(?). Our conversations are always excellent. To the point where we have semi seriously laughed about having our own podcast about all the nonsense that goes on during our talks. Now would people listen to it? And could we ever actually get paid for just talking? Well we'll keep you posted. In the mean time we'll keep them to ourselves.


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